Huh.

It doesn't hurt, oddly. I see the sweet back and forth, laid open, like everything on Facebook, for anyone with eyes to read. It doesn't hurt. I watch your word play, and I feel...

Sorry for you. Yes. I think it's a little bit pathetic how much you already cater to her. You can't be happy by yourself, you need someone else to twine yourself around so that you know who you are? How can I respect that? You have to be strong as yourself before you can begin to be given away to another. You have to know who you are before you alter yourself for love.

You can't even really know if you love Someone, or you just love the Idea of someone. Can you really not stand being alone that much? Are you uncomfortable enough in your own skin that you need someone always with you to tell you how it fits?

Be confident, kid! You are an amazing person! You're kind, funny, and horribly inconsistent, but when you're there, I love it. You're easy to talk to, and you have interesting things to say. YOU are enough. You don't need any attachments to improve.

Oddly, I think this is my final disillusionment with you. I thought that seeing you single would be great for me, but I hated that you were sad. I thought you were only hurting because of the circumstances, but now it seems you hurt because you were alone. I've watched you, these past few months, flitting around, trying to find someone new. I've only just now realized that I don't have to be someone I'm not to attract you, I very likely only had to be there. But I'm not, so I can observe.

Can finally see you not as an object of a crush that has been stretched out for far too long, but as a person. Flawed and broken in a way that I do not much respect. I am insecure, I question myself, I get lonely. It happens all the time. But I can be complete as me. Just me. Sure I'd like another, but not one who would define me. Just someone to be there, to make me smile.

But I CAN smile alone.

I do it all the time.